To the Hiusbands and Wives

Having a successful marriage is no easy task. When it was decided that we should be joined together ‘till death do we part the average life span was 30. Marry at 15 and 15 years is about how long forever wAs. Today forever is a considerably longer amount of time. Our children ( who we love more than anything ) we are sick of and ready for them to get out on their own at 18. Though hard’s not impossible...even in this disposable society.

There are benefits to marriage. The obvious one is raising children. Taxes are better for married people. Typically financially it’s easier when married. There have been studies that say married people live longer. Having a partner in life can give you a sense of support. Someone to lean on as well as someone who needs you. Having a partner can give you someone to hold you accountable. Helping you achieve your goals and be successful. They can understand you, share in your hopes and dreams. Walk with you through the ups and downs in life and be there to hold your hand when our father calls you to Heaven. Going into marriage with some realistic ideas will certainly help reduce disappointments that can lead to divorce. Expect your mate to change. Change is inevitable. It’s seems many woman marry hoping the man WILL change and men marry hoping their wives WILL NOT change. Well people do change. Not always in the way we imagine. Expect this in your partner and recognize that your ability to accept these changes will greatly increase your chances of success. Whatever you did in the beginning to attract your partner needs to be something that you don’t forget. If he or she isn’t responding to you the way that they used to than maybe go all out the way you once did. Shave, wash your truck, put on cologne, buy flowers, whatever it took the first time...try it again. are visual so try and appeal to this. Your going to age and things will change physically but you can still present yourself the best possible way. Remember there’s no amount of crazy bitch that will keep him at home. Jealousy and clingy behavior will not produce any good results. You will not always love your partner. At times you will hate them and want nothing to do with them. That’s why it’s vital to marry someone that you respect and put in rules that foster that respect. It’s this respect that will keep you from crossing lines that can’t be undone. Try hard to maintain your intimacy, keep a bit of modesty alive as far as personal hygiene is concerned. Remember that if your not doing it ...somebody else will. Learn to really listen to each other. Take time for yourselves and each other. Put your relationship above all because the success of it is the basis for your entire family. Build a relationship with God. It’s those principles that will guide you and I believe we should respect and honor our gender roles. Men provide and protect...ladies wow them like you did when they fell in love. Commitment is the one thing that a successful marriage must have. If you leave than there’s no marriage. Sometimes that is the only option left. When that’s where you are...remember YOU choose this person to have children with. Hurting them will only hurt your children. Helping them to be the best parent they can is a better routeNo one is perfect. Not even you. There are three sides to everything. His , hers and the truth. Sex is not the same for men as it is with woman. Men can love someone and have sex with someone else. They can have sex with someone they don’t even like. Remember it’s not that she is prettier than you, younger or better. It’s only that she’s not you. Hopefully you will not find yourself here. If you do and many will there’s really nothing I can say that will ease your broken heart. I am truly sorry.